


Things We Lost. (In The Fire)

by missingisntanoption



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Spoilers, Angst, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, what happens next
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-02
Updated: 2014-06-02
Packaged: 2018-01-27 20:41:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1721906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missingisntanoption/pseuds/missingisntanoption
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SHIELD had been a well-oiled machine, taking out those considered dangerous and protection Earth. Until one day it fell. Hydra had infiltrated, had been inside of SHIELD for longer than anyone, even Fury realized. Many died in those days when Hydra made a stand. Even more in the battle to bring Hydra down with them. This isn’t about them. This is about the ones who survived.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. From the Ashes

**Author's Note:**

> So.. I started this wanting to base it off the Bastille song, 'Things We Lost'. I still plan on that happening, but I have idea's running rampant. This is the first chapter of my first ever fanfic. I've done drabbles and such, but this will be longer. So reviews would be nice. 
> 
> Unbeta'd so sorry for any mistakes. If anyone wants to beta just let me know.

SHIELD had been a well-oiled machine, taking out those considered dangerous and protection Earth. Until one day it fell. Hydra had infiltrated, had _been_ inside of SHIELD for longer than anyone, even Fury realized. Many died in those days when Hydra made a stand. Even more in the battle to bring Hydra down with them. This isn’t about them. This is about the ones who survived.

Phil Coulson was now Director of SHIELD, or at least what used to be. Now he didn’t know what to call it. Just that he was supposed to run it. His team was there. Everyone except for Grant. Fitz was in a coma still, and Simmons wouldn’t leave his side. Skye, Trip, and May were doing what they could. Which was whatever Coulson asked. It wasn’t enough.  There was Romanoff as well. But she was on her own mission, along with Rogers. They were handling the U.S Government, and that was a job all on its own.

Anyone who could help was needed. There was one person missing, one who Phil needed for this to happen. One who would be far angrier than Steve or Natasha when he found out Phil was still alive. Not because he was upset about it, but because he hadn’t been told. Clint Barton. Except Clint Barton was wanted by the federal government for terrorism against the United States of America, and Phil refused to believe Barton was Hydra.

Phil wasn’t stupid by any definition of the word. He realized that he’d need the whole Avenger’s team to help him put this back together. Stark had opened a private sector. Which was good, but frustrating at the same time. He was losing agents to it, agents he needed. It gave him a migraine to think about.

Soon, he was pulled from his thoughts, a knock on his office door. “Come in.” Phil called, watching the door open. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw Melinda dragging an almost unconscious body through the door. He gasped when he realized who it was.

 

* * *

 

Natasha and Steve were together, doing what they could. It wasn’t much, it certainly wasn’t enough. The Government was on their asses constantly. Threatening, demanding, in general being a pain in the ass, and it was pissing them off.

Natasha more than Steve. Natasha because they were accusing Clint of being a part of this, and that pissed her off more than if _she_ was being accused.

Now, they were on their way back to Coulson. The week had been filled with press releases designed to calm the public. It didn’t help. They just wanted to know more. Answers they didn’t know, or couldn’t give. Multiple questions had been about Barton. About where he was, why he wasn’t brought in yet. How could an Avenger be a traitor? At first her answers had been calm. Repeating a textbook answer. There wasn’t enough information about the situation, no evidence to support or deny the accusation.

Later on, as the questions increased, Natasha would lose her cool, shouting at the reporters.

She’d leave Steve to finish up, calm down the crowd, before going to calm her. He was meant to do all this, reassure the public. She was a _spy_. Or she had been. Not anymore. Not with her new infamy.

Steve had his own problems. Bucky was alive. The Winter Solider. He was here, instead of looking for him, and that took a toll on him as well, but he managed to keep it hidden. Once things had settled, he’d go for him. But for now he had to help his country.

The flight home had been silent. One of Tony’s private jets to bring them back to the base. Back to Coulson to see what else they could do to help. Any more press conferences and they’d probably both lose it. Natasha stared out the window, and Steve read a book, comfortable silence between them.

When they landed, Natasha grabbed her bag, Steve his own. They jumped in the back of the car sent to pick them up, and the driver updated them on things they missed.

Neither of them knew what to say when they heard who had shown up.

* * *

 

Tony and Bruce were holed up in Stark Towers. Of course Pepper was there, and occasionally Thor would appear, bringing Jane with him. Things weren’t bad, but they could be a lot worse. None of them knew what to do. Tony knew that Coulson was pissed he was taking agents. But he was doing the only thing he could think of to help. None of them were safe with Shield, and he made sure that they had the option to get out if they needed or wanted. It wasn’t personal. God knows it wasn’t. Stark had been relieved—that’s the only word for it—when he found out Phil wasn’t dead. Pepper had cried, and no one was really sure how Bruce reacted, just that he had disappeared for a couple days. Thor of course, had been enthusiastic, nearly killing Phil for a second time when he hugged him.

Life as usual, Tony speculated. He had gone back to tinkering on suits. Not obsessively. Not like before. Just one or two, and Pepper made sure it stayed that way. Once or twice a week, Tony tried to make it so they all had dinner. Him, Pepper, Bruce, Natasha, and Steve when they were around. Thor too, sometimes Jane and Darcy if he brought them around.

They all noticed Clint’s absence, and there was always that silent question wondering if he really did betray them, betray SHIELD. The conversation rarely happened, but when it did Natasha wasn’t around for it. They weren’t stupid.

It was late afternoon when Jarvis informed Tony and Bruce that there was an incoming call from Director Coulson. “Answer..” Tony replied to the AI, listening as Phil’s voice told them who had just been brought into his office. Told them they might want to take the next flight to the base.

So they did.

 

* * *

 

Clint had spent the last few weeks doing anything he could to get to a base where _someone_ was left. He didn’t know what had happened, just that Hydra had completely torn apart the base he had been in. He had barely escaped. A quick assessment of himself told Clint that he was sporting a couple broken ribs, a possible sprained ankle, and a definite concussion.

In other words, he hurt like hell.

It wasn’t a new experience, but usually he could look forward to a point where he’d be able to rest. That eventually the mission would be over. No matter what the outcome, he’d be treated for any injuries (despite his objections, he could take care of himself, thank you very much.), and when he was better he’d be on another mission.

Everything had changed now. Shield had fallen, and apparently he was wanted for terrorism. He had seen himself all over the television. Wanted.  He had no way to know what was happening except from what he saw on the news. And that wasn’t always reliable. Reason would tell him to pick up a phone, call someone. Except who was he supposed to trust? Natasha, she was obvious, but her phone had been disconnected. He did see her on the news. With Rogers, and the conference after everything went down, telling them to arrest them if they wanted.

And they had been. Anyone even remotely under suspicion for Hydra affiliation was taken in, and Clint realized just how suspicious he’d be. Escaping from what was a complete Hydra base. God damn Fury for sending him. God damn Fury for _dying._

Clint was moving through every base he knew, some he had only heard rumors about. They were all deserted, and each time he felt his hope dying. New York then, if he could get to New York, Stark would be there… but Stark wasn’t answering the phone either, and he was across the damn county. A plane would be great, except Clint would be detained the second he tried to get a ticket. He had to stay away from anywhere with public cameras. His face was too recognized for him to stay anywhere for too long. So he just had to keep moving.

So weeks after Shield had fallen, after he’d been on the run, searching for _anyone_ who could help him. He came across another Base. One that was different. This one was populated. He wasn’t sure if it was Shield or Hydra, but he was on his last leg. If this was going to be his last moments so be it.

He the entrance, not noticing until too late the sniper in the window. The tranqgun in their hand. “Fuck.” Clint mumbled, his vision went fuzzy and he collapsed.

* * *

 

 The Avengers had reassembled completely, for the first time since all of it went down. All of them searching for answers, a way to fix things.

Clint was handcuffed to a cot as he slept off the tranquilizer. No one wanted to believe that he might of betrayed them, but they had to be careful.

Hours after everyone had arrived, Clint groaned------


	2. More Questions than Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team is hurt and confused, scared that Clint could have betrayed them.   
> Phil is battling with his own emotions, and Clint just wants it over with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UnBeta'd, I am sorry for any mistakes. (Which I'm sure there are many.)  
> There probably won't be another update until next weekend, but we'll see !  
> Comments/Reviews are appreciated!

When Clint woke up his body still felt slow and sluggish. His memories were slowly coming back to him, and once he realized what happened, he struggled against the cuffs, eyes snapping open.

It took him a couple of seconds to register exactly what, or rather _who_ he was seeing. Stark, Rogers, Banner, Thor, Natasha, and.. _Phil_.” Instantly Clint squeezed his eyes shut again, because this was a dream. A hallucination brought on by the tranq. Because Phil was dead. He had seen the tapes. Phil was definitely dead, and he definitely shouldn’t be standing there with that look on his face.

 _That_ look. He wasn’t angry, not even accusing. Just a hint of disappointment. It always had made Clint feel bad about whatever he’d done to deserve that look. He wasn’t quite sure why he was getting it now. Then—there was Natasha. Studying him like she was trying to read his mind.

Clint barely registered the others now. Still in a sort-of-shock.

Clearing his throat, Clint forced a grin, tilting his head a bit. Anything to stop from looking vulnerable, even in front of his friends.

“Hey..”

 

* * *

 

 

The whole team had their eyes on Barton as soon as he moved. Instantly their mouths opened, all wanting their questions answered now. Phil stopped that with a single raised hand, watching as Clint started to wake up. Watching as his eyes opened, and those damn eyes went through a myriad of emotions before shutting again momentarily.

“Clint..” Phil finally spoke, his voice calm. He tried to keep the emotion out of his eyes, but he was scared that Clint had really betrayed him. That the man he watched grow into himself had been a lie. Still, when he saw that smile, the cocky way he spoke, Phil’s lips almost turned to a smile of his own. But he stopped it. This was serious.

“You’re safe right now, but the cuffs need to stay on for a while. Until we can ask you some questions. Do you understand that?”

He watched as Clint nodded, eyes still confused and hurt even as Phil could see he was trying to hide it. Taking a deep breath, he nodded as well, glancing over at the team.

“I’ll go set up the test. You can uncuff him from the bed, but not completely. I’ll be back. And with that, Phil left the office.”

* * *

 

Skye, Trip, and Simmons were at his side instantly, questions spurring out. May was off somewhere, letting him sort out business “Sir..” Jemma started, her frown deep. “Who was that? Why was he in cuffs?”

“Was he Hydra? Because I didn’t get to kick Ward’s ass, and I’d like a chance to hurt someone.” Skye offered up.

Trip stayed silent for once, wanting to hear what Phil would say.

“I understand none of you got a good look at him, otherwise I’m sure you’d know who he was.” Phil starts, walking towards the room with the lie detector in it. He’d stick to direct questions. Stopping Clint from having the ability to talk around the test.

“That. Was Specialist Clint Barton. Hawkeye if you’d rather.”

Instantly there was a gasp of recognition from Trip and Jemma. Skye just raised an eyebrow. “Hawkeye, as in the Avenger? Isn’t he wanted for Hydra involvement?”

“Suspected. And I plan on clearing that accusation today.”

“But what he is..” Skye countered, eyes wide.

“Then I’ll deal with him accordingly.”

They all fell silent, watching Coulson as he set everything up almost mechanically. It was obvious this was bothering him. Instead of pushing it further, they all let it go. Even if Skye didn’t particularly want to. “Tell us if you need anything.” Jemma stated, before leaving, dragging the two others with her.

* * *

 

“I swear to god Clint, if you betrayed us---“ Natasha was cut off by Steve’s hand on her arm. The voice of reason, even now. Tony, who for once managed to keep his mouth shut, walked over and uncuffed him, but quickly put his wrists back together. At least now he could sit up.

So everyone watched as he did just that, looking up at all of them, mouth opening and closing a few times.

“I didn’t betray SHIELD.” He said quietly, throat dry and raspy. “I wouldn’t.. I didn’t betray any of you.. I don’t know why their saying I did.”

Banner and Thor were silent as well, watching him with a certain aspect of distrust. It was to be expected, really. “Where were you then?” Bruce finally asked, studying him. “Weeks, you were off the radar--.”

Natasha cut in a gain. “Your base was overrun, and you managed to get out?” She asked, but it sounded more accusing than praising. “Tell me why I should believe that.” She was hurt and scared. They all were. Since SHIELD had fallen they had all been vulnerable. Every single one of them had been marked to die when Hydra took over Project Insight.

“I got out Tasha, I just did. I- I’m pretty beat up actually. It took me weeks to get here.. Everything is abandoned. Cell wasn’t working, and I had to stay away from anywhere public.. I’m too recognizable.” Clint’s eyes were pleading. He hadn’t done what they all seemed to think he had.

“You gotta believe me..”

Steve was the first to sigh, nodding. Tony was next, followed by Banner and Thor. Natasha just shook her head. “I don’t trust easily. You know that Clint. Prove it. Take the test Phil has, and then we’ll talk.”

Clint just nodded, before freezing.

“I—I didn’t imagine him then.. he was really here.. bu-but how?”

No one replied at first, before finally Steve spoke up once more.

“Classified for now. Once you pass the test we can talk..” Steve watched as Clint nodded- defeated.

As they waited there was silence, Clint still exhausted. He wanted this over as quickly as possible. The minutes felt like hours, and the ten minutes it took for Coulson to come back felt like days.

“It’s ready.” Phil said, tone calm and flat.

Tony helped Clint stand as they all filed out, apparently determined to be there when the test was administrated.  Clint kept his head down, tired of seeing the accusations in some people’s eyes. He ignored the others that he didn’t know watching them as they paraded to the room where the test was in. 

* * *

 

“Answer all questions as direct as you can.” Phil started, pulling out his gun, and placing it where Clint could see it. “I _will_ know if you’re lying, and should that happen, you better have a damn good reason as to why..”

Phil took a deep breath.

“Clint. If you made a mistake, then tell me now, because it’s going to be worse if I find out through this test that you betrayed us….” Phil waited, but Clint just shook his head no, offering no other response.

“Okay.. We’ll start with your name.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger(: Sort of? This chapter is shorter, but I'll work on longer ones.


End file.
